14 Jul Am I The Only One Who Doesn’t Give A Sh*t About Love Island?

If you’ve been anywhere near the internet recently you might have caught wind of Love Island – a show where 12 pornst- sorry,  “contestants”, live in an island villa, shouting, arguing and fornicating it out for the public’s votes. Sounds good right?

Well it isn’t really… at all. As someone who’s grown up in a house plagued by the weekly monotones of Simon Cowell’s voice, I’ve learnt to block out the furore of reality TV, or at least I thought I had. Love Island has me particularly irked.

To quote Andy Millman (Ricky Gervais) from Extras, “the Victorian freak show never went away, now it’s called Big Brother or X Factor”… or I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here or The Only Way Is Essex or Love Island. You get the point. Except instead of bodily contortions, these “freaks” have six packs and fake boobs, and sadly that is exactly the point.

All the guys on the show act as interchangeable testosterone vessels, each having their turn with the girls who, no doubt ordered by the producers, take turns to play victim or villain as the relationships on the island inevitably boil over.

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