28 Jun 8 of the Stupidest Reasons Countries Ever Went To War

Human beings have always been a particularly warlike species. From the moment of our inception, way back in the misty years of prehistory, conflict has been an inextricable aspect of our inner nature, and as history has worn on, and nations have grown and expanded in influence, the wars have only gotten more devastating and costly.

You’d think that it would take something pretty drastic to force two nations to declare war on each other and march into battle, but you’d be wrong. Wars where many soldiers have lost their lives have occurred due to disputes as trivial as those between two neighbours arguing over a fence. In fact, some of these examples from the forgotten pages of the history books, are likely to make you cringe and ask “what on earth were they thinking?”

1. The Pig War

The Pig War occurred in 1859, when an American farmer living in the San Juan Islands near Vancouver, Canada, killed a British-owned pig which was eating potatoes in his garden. The border restrictions between the countries regarding who owned what territory on the island were loose.

British authorities attempted to extradite the farmer, but he sought protection from the U.S. military. Brigadier General William S. Harney initially dispatched 66 American soldiers to San Juan Island with orders to prevent the British from landing, but the conflict continued to escalate until five British warships bearing men 2,140 sailed to the island. Eventually, military officials managed to resolve the issue before shots were fired.

2. The War of Jenkins’ Ear

In the 18th Century, Britain was hoping to go to war with Spain, but they hadn’t been provoked nearly enough to justify an international conflict. In 1739, it was decided to use the (fairly flimsy) justification that Spanish coast guards had boarded an English vessel and sliced off the earlobe of Captain Jenkins eight years previously. War was thus declared. To add insult to injury, nowadays there’s some doubt as to whether or not the eponymous Captain Jenkins truly had his ear hacked off, or whether he even existed in the first place.

3. The Dog Tax War

This conflict was the last war between native New Zealanders and British Colonists. In 1898 the Hokianga County Council introduced a tax of 2/6d (approximately $85.85) on all dogs owned by the local Maori population. The impoverished Maori decided to violently rebel, and a short military campaign was fought, when Maori man Hone Toia led 150 men against the British. Despite the hostile standoff that ensued, the war ultimately boasted no casualties. Sadly, the dog tax was not repealed, and is still loosely in place today.

4. The War of the Golden Stool

In Ghana, 1900, a war broke out between the British and Ashanti over a gold chair. In Ashanti mythology, the golden stool was represented the souls of the Ashanti tribe entire. Frederick Hodgson, the regional governor, was unaware of the significance of the chair. Hodgson demanded the Ashanti hand it over so that he could sit on the gilded throne. The mortified Ashanti declared war on the British settlers in order to keep his backside off of it. After 3,000 deaths, the British never acquired the stool. Hodgson never sat on it. Ironically the Ashanti would have been content for Queen Victoria to sit on the stool, seeing as she was supreme head of state. Hodgson was considered inferior.

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